Toady and Queenie
by Varmint
Summary: Soulmates didn't exist just for romantic purposes. Which, considering who his soulmate happened to be, was quite the fitting take on the world. Third in the 'This is How I Met My Soulmate' Collection! Platonic Soulmates! Rare-pair: Jiraiya/Ino! One-shot! And gift for the ever amazing Smartasswolf23!


Summary: Soulmates weren't created solely for the purpose of finding one's romantic partner. Jiraiya had lived long enough to believe soulmates existed to keep one another afloat, be each other's hope. But they weren't here just for romantic purposes. Which, considering who his soulmate happened to be, was quite the fitting take on the world.

Pairings:

Jiraiya/Ino

Yasuko (Ino's Mother)/Inoichi

Warnings: Like with the first installment of this series, the only real warning I've got for you guys is slight angst and a huge age gap between soulmates. If none of these sound like cup of tea, there is a back button on the upper left corner of your computer screen.

Belongs to: Third in the 'This is How I Met My Soulmate' Collection

*Special thanks to SmartassWolf23 for helping me come up with quite a few bits of this story! She's the reason why Ino's with Jiraiya! I love you, you infuriatingly loveable woman! I hope this is a good surprise!

(If you're an Ino lover, check her shit out. It's pretty cool.)

* * *

The moment when Jiraiya first laid his eyes on his soulmate, he risked getting his jaw broken by the young baby's father.

Inoichi had wanted to shatter the very existence that was Jiraiya, the Sannin. The Yamanaka wanted to see him destroyed, never to be heard from ever again. And all because of something that neither male could truly control.

"I'm not a pedophile!"

"She's my child! You stay the hell away from her before I-"

Inoichi's soulmate, the young girl's mother, had walked up to her husband and placed her hand over his mouth. This effectively shut the impassioned Yamanaka, allowing Jiraiya a reprieve from the man's scathing words.

Slowly, the man unwrapped his arms from around the tree he had hidden in when Inoichi had figured out why it was that he had not been able to force his eyes away from the baby in the stroller. But, even though Inoichi had now been rather successfully restrained by his good friends and wife, the white haired Sannin was still not going to drop back onto the ground. He didn't feel like getting mauled by an overprotective father.

"Something must always happen whenever I accompany you to the market..." He heard Orochimaru lament beneath him. And when he looked down, it was to find his best friend looking over at the enraged Yamanaka being restrained by an Akimichi, a Nara, and his wife with completely disinterested and unsurprised eyes. "There is a reason I did not want to go out today, toad."

Jiraiya was more than aware that today was the day in which he would meet his soulmate. He'd been eagerly waiting for this day for his whole life! He couldn't forget that! But he certainly hadn't expected to find out that his soulmate was more than twenty years his junior. Just like he hadn't expected to find himself hiding up in a tree to keep a man younger than him from killing him.

The younger of the two Sannin frowned at his best friend, then looked back towards the man that wanted to kill him. "I can't control who my soulmate is, Inoichi! You know that!"

"You stay the hell away from my daughter or I'll make-"

The blonde had managed to escape from his wife's hand. But Choza still held onto him, keeping his body held tight even as the man's mouth ran. Shikaku, from behind, was keeping a rather lazy eye on the situation. But from the shadows growing from his feet, Jiraiya knew that he was giving his own aid in keeping the Yamanaka restrained. No matter how little effort he put into it.

"Well, this has been rather entertaining." Orochimaru interrupted with an disinterested wave of his hand, then appeared right beside Jiraiya to clasp him on the shoulder. "But we'll be leaving now."

~/~

The first time Jiraiya met his soulmate, it wasn't even a proper meeting.

~/~

Ino could not remember the first time she had seen the man with the beautiful white hair and red marks on his cheeks. No matter how much she forced herself to think, she could not pinpoint the first time they had actually met and spoken.

It was as if he had always been a part of her life. Even though her father didn't actually know that they talked to each other.

The man was funny. He sometimes brought her brownies, which were her favorite snack foods, and told her wonderful stories. He would sit her beside him and proceed to tell her fantastic adventures he and Mr. Snakey had gone on years ago, all the while little Ino kicked her feet and marveled at how amazing his stories were.

Toady was the name she had given him. He had insisted that his name was something much too hard for her to say. So she had settled on Toady. Just like Mr. Snakey had a name that was much too long to be bothered with.

These two didn't come around too often. Mr. Snakey even less than Toady. But whenever her father wasn't around and her mother took her to the park to make friends with kids her age- even though she didn't want to make friends because boys were stupid and girls always tried to tell her she needed to change something about herself-, Toady would appear and spend the whole afternoon with her.

Her mom always smiled kindly when she heard Ino retelling Toady's stories. But, for some reason Ino didn't truly understand, she wasn't allowed to tell her father all the wonderful tales. Even though she _knew_ that the man would love to hear about some of the things Toady and Mr. Snakey had done.

~/~

The first time Ino met Jiraiya was lost on her. But he had always been around her for as long as she could remember.

~/~

Inoichi had continued on an anti-Jiraiya vendetta for years after they had found out who his soulmate was. He refused to allow the man to see his only daughter and ignored his wife's logical points about how hurtful it would be in the long run to keep soulmates separated.

Jiraiya had respected the man's wishes at first. In part because he respected the accomplished interrogator. But mostly because he had been so caught by surprise at the young age of his soulmate that he wasn't completely sure if he even wanted to know her.

Age gaps between soulmates was not a new or rare phenomena. It happened often enough in the world to not be considered as anomalies. But it was always a rather fragile subject, for it brought up dozens of questions that weighed on a person's morals.

He'd kept his distance at first. The Sannin had continued living his life as if nothing had changed, still went on missions for his Hokage and teased Orochimaru about his many 'children' because of the Inuzuka Clan. Just about nothing changed... And Jiraiya felt alright with it. Because, really, he'd lived a whole life without a soulmate. He didn't need one to continue living.

Repeating this lie to himself had worked for a good few years.

But then, one day when Inoichi was outside of the village as part of a caravan of interrogators that were needed to find important information about a terrorist cell currently threatening Konoha, Jiraiya found himself with no other choice but to admit that he _really_ wanted to know his soulmate; be an actual part of her life.

"Yasuko? What are you doing here?"

"Her name is Ino. She's three years old, loves brownies, and much smarter than your average kid." The woman motioned towards the young girl that stood beside her.

Ino's bright blue eyes were looking up at Jiraiya with curiosity shining clear within them.

Unlike many young kids Jiraiya had met- excluding Tsume and Minato's hellions-, Ino didn't cower behind her mother. Instead she stood beside her, much too curious to seem scared of the man she was meeting.

"I got tired of Inoichi's theatrics." The brown haired woman continued, ignoring the completely stunned and stupefied look plastered on Jiraiya's face. "It was about time Ino met her soulmate. Now, are you going to leave us standing out in this rain?"

Momentarily brought out of his stupor by the bordering-Orochimaru sarcastic voice, Jiraiya blinked away from Ino and looked up at the sky. It was beginning to drizzle and the shinobi walking around the streets of this side of town were scurrying to return to their homes. The clouds looked heavy and dark, as if they were prepared to send down heavy torrents of rain.

In a story, the bad weather would be taken as an omen... Probably of Jiraiya's death.

But for once, the man ignored the writer's voice screaming within him. He stepped to the side and allowed both Yamanaka to enter, then found himself having to apologize for the disarray his apartment found itself in.

~/~

Yasuko never allowed him to forget the pitiful bachelor pad Jiraiya called home for years.

~/~

Boys were stupid. Mr. Snakey had told her that this was normal, although regrettable. And, unfortunately, they would remain stupid for a very long time.

He'd also said that there were some that stayed stupid for the rest of their lives, like Toady, but Ino didn't believe that. Toady was a very intelligent and kind man. He wasn't stupid like the boys around him. Those guys were hopeless.

"Hey! You can't wear that!"

Five year old Ino was not someone that liked being told what to do. And as long as her mother didn't tell her anything, the girl knew that she was in the right.

So when a stupid boy with bright blonde her and sky blue eyes walked up to her in the park and pointed at her shirt as if it were some great monster, all the while telling her she couldn't wear it, the Yamanaka rolled her eyes and scoffed.

"Yes I can!"

"No, you can't!"

"Yeah, I can!"

"No!"

Annoyed with the shouting match, the girl narrowed her eyes, crossed her arms over her chest, and cocked her hip to the side. It was a mirror image to Orochimaru's own unimpressed stance.

"And why can't I wear this?"

It was a beautiful shirt that shoved off a bit of her stomach. It ended just above her navel. And she wore a nice skirt along with it, seeing how she was supposed to go have dinner with her parents after her friends got to the park. They were just waiting for Shikamaru, Chouji, and their parents to arrive so they could all walk to the restaurant.

"Because it shows off your mark!"

The finger being pointed at her was accusatory and shook a bit.

Ino looked down at herself, noted the toad that had been on her skin for as long as she could remember, and then looked back at the blonde annoyance in front of her.

"Yeah. And?"

"That's not right!"

Ino growled at the boy, " _You're_ not right!" Then she turned around with a haughty huff and marched towards her mother.

Her father's face was pinched in and looked not too happy, but her mother was smiling.

"I'll show off my stomach if I want to!"

~/~

Even from a young age, Ino never allowed anyone to tell her how she should and should not dress. Much to her father's grievance.

~/~

On Ino's sixth birthday, Inoichi extended what could be called an olive branch. He invited Jiraiya over to the party- completely reluctantly, at that. All that he asked of the man was to be proper and not do anything too scandalous while around. Oh, and to bring Orochimaru with him.

Jiraiaya was insulted by the indirect insults to his character. Just because he dabbled in erotic writing did not meant that his whole being was perverted! Forget all of those incidents in the saunas, training areas, communal baths, etc.! And asking for Orochimaru meant that Inoichi did not trust him to keep control of himself without his best friend. Huge insult.

He'd actually had half a mind to just not go to the party. And if he did, he would make sure to _ruin_ Inoichi's day... But then Orochimaru had smacked him upside the head and reminded him that this was his _soulmate's_ party.

Ino's bubbly smile and excited eyes filled up his mind's eye at that moment. And all anger left Jiraiya at that very moment because... Well... He was a sucker for Ino's baby blues.

When they had arrived at the party, Jiraiya could not help but feel somewhat out of place. There were children zooming around and parents chattering to each other about family things.

Orochimaru was much better suited for this situation. Even though not many would consider him a family man, he actually was. And he had been kind of adopted into the Inuzuka Clan, so he was considered like another member of the pack by Tsume's kids. Who were here.

"Orochi!" Tsume's smile was a cross between feral and amused as she walked towards her old teacher, "And Jiraiya too! To what do we owe this great surprise?"

"We were invited to young Ino's party." Orochimaru explained smoothly, signaling to the boxes of presents both men had in their hands. "Where is the heiress?"

"Arguing with Naruto about her soul mark again." Jiraiya stiffened upon hearing this and he immediately began to look for the girl. "Namikaze's kid is going to get himself killed. Mark my words."

"His whole family is prone to suicidal tendencies." Orochimaru answered, then looked over at his friend.

Jiraiya _really_ wanted to find Ino to try and understand why she was arguing with her friend over her soul mark.

"There she is." Tsume pointed towards the back of the Yamanaka flower shop, towards the play area.

Through the open door, Jiraiya was able to see two shocks of blonde hair.

"Thank you, Tsume." He nodded at the woman, handed his present to Orochimaru, and rushed towards the outside.

~/~

Jiraiya had grown up hiding his mark, just like everyone else. And he'd been made fun of whenever it was seen, most people considered it much too feminine for him. He had worried that Ino's would be ridiculed for being an ugly toad.

~/~

It was her birthday. But Naruto insisted on being an idiot.

"It's not right! Genma Sensei said so!"

Ino huffed and shook her head, then looked over at the friends that had gathered around her.

Shikamaru and Chouji would help her out if she asked it of them. But it was obvious that they would defend her point, they were her friends. Naruto wouldn't listen to them, just like he didn't listen to her.

Most of the kids in her party were children of her parents' friends. So, they weren't really her friends.

Although...

"Kiba!"

The Inuzuka's head shot up from the hole he had been digging in her play area, eyes wide "What?!"

"Come over here!"

He grumbled a bit as he stood up. But soon the Inuzuka was in front of her, covered in dirt and annoyed by having been taken away from his endeavor.

"Should I cover up my soul mark?"

Kiba blinked at her for a second. Then he shrugged, "Why should I care?"

With a smirk on her lips, Ino turned to Naruto. "Exactly."

Naruto glared. Kiba huffed about stupid girls. And Ino merely smirked in smugness.

An itch in the side of her head had her looking away from Naruto and towards her house. And when she did, she found Toady standing at the threshold, a soft smile on his face.

"Toady!" She smiled and ran up to him, then began to chatter his ear off about how awesome her party would be now that he was around.

~/~

Ino loved her toad. That was all that mattered.

~/~

Jiraiya should not have worried... Ino was a fiery spirit. She knew how to take care of herself.

His little princess... No, that wasn't right. His little _queen_ would be more than just alright.

~/~

Toady was a funny guy. He seemed to smile even larger than before at her birthday. But Ino was okay with that.

She loved seeing Toady smile.

* * *

Gods... I just can't stop myself from writing pure fluff sometimes... And then there's the angst... How could such different things live within me? I'm a huge weirdo, I've decided.

It's much shorter than the other entries of the 'This is How I Met My Soulmate' collection. But I think it's perfect as it is.

And if you're wondering "Just what the heck is this story? What is Orochimaru doing in the village? Why is he considered part of the Inuzuka pack? And why is everyone around them so used to having what we know as a missing nin around them?" go and check out the first two parts of the collection. _Our Little (Great), Unimportant (Life Changing) Meeting_ and _Jashin's Chokehold._ The first deals with Orochimaru finding his soulmate and takes place in the actual time stamp of Naruto. The second deals with Tobirama meeting his, but it also stars Orochimaru. They're both longer than this, and the first has much heavier angst, but it might help answer some questions. Not all. I'm still answering a lot myself.

Please remember to review and tell me what you think!


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